Less is More: Jeff Garlin loses weight and stays funny

Jeff Garlin at Temple Jeremiah

Well yeah. I was just sitting here, eating my muffin, drinking my coffee, when I had what alcoholics refer to as a moment of clarity.~ Jules Winnfield, Pulp Fiction

For Jeff Garlin, his moment of clarity came from seeing a photo in the Living XL catalog.

“But here’s the moment that might be the real bottom for me: I turn the page and look at the model who’s displaying the Cabin Comfort Inflatable Pillow—and who do you think he looks like? That’s right, he looks like me.”

On Tuesday March 2, Jeff Garlin, a star and co-producer of Curb Your Enthusiasm, read from his new book My Footprint: Carrying the Weight of the World at Northfield’s Temple Jeremiah.

One night returning home after seeing Wall-E, Garlin

Jeff Garlin's fat doppelganger from Living XL catalog

who played the inspiring Captain McCrea in the film, decided to act on his desire to lose weight. A desire that had been with him for nearly 30 years. As the Captain in Wall- E says, “I can’t just sit here and…and…do nothing! That’s all I’ve done!”

Garlin writes, “Later on that night, as I lie in bed with my mind racing, the full idea hits me. I’ll write about it. And just like in WALL-E, I’ll go green, too. I’ll lower my carbon footprint as I lower my personal footprint.”

After reading from the prologue and the first chapter, Garlin answered questions from a packed house of

Curb Your Enthusiasm fans, Garlin’s relatives, and friends of Garlin’s relatives. It is no coincidence; Jeff’s brother Michael Garlin, is the Executive Director of Temple Jeremiah. At the book signing, Garlin’s mother Carole was “kvelling” (sort of an untranslatable Yiddish expression of joy and pride generally reserved for parents and grandparents).

Jeff Garlin and brother Michael counting the house

Michael Garlin displayed some of his own comedy chops. Jeff asked for some water and was handed plastic bottled water. Jeff seemed dismayed as bottled water does not fit into a “green lifestyle.” So Michael walked away and returned with a pitcher of water and a glass. After putting the water down and walking off, Michael said (off stage), “you can pour it yourself.”

Carole Garlin, Jeff's mom, kvelling

Garlin was happy to answer questions.” Not thrilled,” he said, “I don’t love answering questions. I love my mother. But I’m happy to answer questions.”

When asked “who makes him laugh,” members of the audience threw out answers before Garlin did. Susie (Susie Essman who plays Garlin’s screachingly funny and foul-mouthed wife on Curb) was an audience favorite. As was Garlin’s mother. “You see,” said Garlin, “that’s what’s great about a room full of Jews, they answer the questions for you.”

Garlin went on to list his comedy favorites, “Jack Benny, Phil Silvers, Albert Brooks, Richard Pryor, South Park and Modern Family.”

When asked if Susie Essman’s insults about his weight bothered him, Garlin said “It’s pretend and I get paid.”

Garlin was frank and funny about his celebrity friends and acquaintances. Jay Leno is a nice, funny guy, “but lacks character” and Garlin “would never appear on his show.” Larry David is not neurotic as he appears on Curb Your Enthusiasm and is a wonderful guy–though David says, “tell them that I’m just like I am on the show.”

When asked what it’s like to work with friend Richard Lewis, Garlin says that with Lewis says the manic behavior is not all an act. “Richard is f@#king out of his mind.”

Jeff Garlin signing My Footprint

Garlin warned his family and friends that in his upcoming show at Park West (March 4@8:00) he does swear. “You can’t do stand-up for all ages.” He didn’t let his older son watch Curb Your Enthusiasm until he became a Bar Mitzvah at age 13. Garlin was uncomfortable when his young (4 to 5 year old) co-stars of Daddy Day Care told him that they were “Curb” fans.

Which brings us back to family. One of Garlin’s cousins reminded him of some of his earliest material. “Remember doody balls?”

Garlin’s reply, “Doody balls. Doody is always funny.”

Garlin was asked if he’d had an “aha” moment regarding show business. “When I was 8 years old, my parents took me to the Palmer House. What was the name of that room? (crowd answers for him, ‘The Empire Room’) We saw Jimmy Durante. In the car on the way home, I asked my parents if that was a ‘job.’ They said that it was. I said I want that job.”

In the prologue, Garlin tells of the Cuban revolutionary poetry (and author of Guantanamera) Jose Martí once said that a person should do three things in his life, ” plant a tree, have a son and write a book.

Garlin has two sons whom he adores (he wants them to be comedians, ‘the world has enough doctors and lawyers’) and now he has written a book. All that’s left is to plant a tree. And he’s already got the tree. It’s a fig tree, “I don’t like figs but my wife does.”

When asked what three things, Garlin wanted to do with his life, he said, “open a chain of lingerie stores,
sell Old West collectibles for at least what he paid for them, and change his name to JoJo.”

Garlin turned serious, briefly, when there was a question about his weight loss. “I am a food addict. For me cookie is like a glass of whisky to an alcoholic. I haven’t eaten sugar in a year.” While the book is not a “how to” book, the advice is pretty direct. “Either make the commitment to lose weight or stop whining about it.”

Jeff Garlin will be at The Book Stall at Chestnut Court, 811 Elm St. Winnetka on Wendesday March 3 at 7:00 Pm and Thursday, March 4th at Park West.